The Gayest Muppets You'll See on My Birthday

Yes, today is Uncle P's birthday. I share it with Vin Diesel; Nelson Mandela; Wendy Williams; Kristen Bell; John Glenn; Red Skelton; Richard Branson; James Brolin; Hunter S. Thompson; Harriet Nelson; Martha Reeves; Elizabeth McGovern (born the same year); Grant Bowler; Paul Verhoeven and my fellow blogger, Horror fan, Facebook friend and Jersey Boy, Pax Romano (among others). 

My poor mother was in labor with me for 46 hours in a Trenton, NJ hospital without air-conditioning during what is traditionally the hottest week of the year. I was two weeks late in a time before planned Caesareans and induced labor. Given the current weather conditions, I can't believe she loves me as much as she does. And while I am hardly a believer in anything supernatural, the Zodiacal descriptions ascribed to my birth date are usually dead-on: Creative; homebody; romantic; family-oriented; sensitive; quirky; adventurous (to a point); imaginative and fiercely loyal. I'd like to think that most of those qualities apply. In my particular case, they often forget moody; restless; insomniacal (yes, I think I made up yet another new word) and just plain weird. Most (if not, all) of my friends will agree to that last one. 

All that aside, having reached an age I couldn't even begin to imagine as a child, I have also become a vociferous defender of LGBTQ rights; an advocate against bullying; a supporter of anti-suicide causes and, despite the unlikelihood of being a participant, a staunch supporter of Marriage Equality.

Which brings me to the video (via) which I am about to share. While neither an authorized product of Henson Productions or its parent company, Disney (both of which are supportive of LGBTQ causes and employees), this version of "The Rainbow Connection" (sung by a Kermit impersonator) speaks for so many folks in a funny and clever way. I hope that my sharing it will help make it go viral. 

If your birthday was today, please let me know. If you are a fellow Cancerian (or 'Moonchild'), please let me know. Hell, if you enjoyed the video or anything I have to say, please let me know. I always love hearing from you. 

More. anon.
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The Gayest Thing You'll See This Week

Michael Douglas and Matt Damon in Behind the Candelabra

It's been a while since I've done a "Gayest Thing" post, but I think this movie warrants one. 

I'm still not sure how I feel about HBO's upcoming film Behind the Candelabra. When I was kid in the 60's and 70's (I keep telling you I'm old), Liberace was a huge star, as famous for his diamond-encrusted pianos and feathered capes as he was for his prodigious talent as a pianist. He loved performing and loved his fans, most of whom were middle-aged straight ladies who imagined the fairly attractive son of Polish immigrants could be theirs for the asking. Liberace was so popular, he even appeared on "Batman" as concert pianist Chandell and his evil twin, Harry who goaded Chandell into becoming the villain "Fingers." In real life, Liberace was born with a twin brother who didn't survive and parodies of him often refer to his brother 'George.' His flamboyant life of excess came to an end in 1987 when he died of AIDS-related pneumonia at the age of 67. Though he was sued for palimony by former chauffeur and alleged lover Scott Thorson in 1982, Liberace denied his homosexuality up until his death. Thorson settled out of court for $95K. At one time the highest paid performer in the world, Liberace supposedly made Thorson have cosmetic surgery in order to make him look like a younger version of himself. 

Director Steven Soderbergh (Magic Mike; Contagion) and HBO have teamed up to bring us Behind the Candelabra, screenwriter Richard LaGravense's take on the tumultuous three-year relationship between Lee (as Liberace's friends knew him) and Thorson. Michael Douglas plays Liberace and Matt Damon is Thorson. As seen in the trailer below, Douglas went out of his way to study and emulate Liberace's iconic vocal patterns, while Damon obviously buffed up to play the flamboyant entertainer's boy-toy:

Rob Lowe; Dan Ackroyd; Cheyenne Jackson; Debbie Reynolds; Scott Bakula and Paul Reiser all have supporting roles (all of whom may well prove far more interesting to see than Douglas and Damon) in what promises to be an exploitative and over-the-top movie from one of the most innovative directors in Hollywood. Uncle P is actually considering subscribing to HBO just to see this film, though in all honestly, I'll probably wait until it's on Netflix or available on DVD. 

Honestly, does it get any gayer than this?

More, anon.
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A Very Sad 'Reality' TV Celebrity Meltdown

Soft Porn... er... "Reality'" star Tila Tequila

Regular readers know how I feel about most so-called "reality TV." Manipulated by writers and producers and edited to provide the most salacious content possible, it is about as far from reality as Grimm's Fairy Tales.

The increasingly stupid populace at large just eats this crap up, and since it's much cheaper to produce than scripted shows, the networks keep pumping it out, ad nauseum. I know what I know about reality shows mostly from reading entertainment blogs and watch "The Soup" on E!. The phenomenon only serves to produce temporary celebrities who will be forgotten as soon as they and their publicists have run out of ways to exploit them.

Tila "Tequila" Nguyen is a Eurasian Penthouse and Maxim model who became semi-famous because of her MTV 'reality' dating show "A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila." A self-proclaimed bisexual, Tila has gone on to be a singer in two bands; the owner of now defunct dating website and the 'fiancee' of the late Johnson & Johnson heiress, Casey Johnson, who passed away from diabetic ketoacidocis in 2009. In an infamous 2010 incident, Tila was pelted with rocks, bottles and feces while appearing as an opener at an Insane Clown Posse concert.In March of this year, she went into rehab after attempting suicide by overdosing on pills.

Since then, she's kept a pretty low profile - until recently. Apparently, artificial fame has proven too much for the poor thing and she has taken to posting videos on YouTube in which she claims the Illuminati are conspiring to kill her for exposing their secrets. Yes, you read that correctly. The Illuminati. You know, the super secret society (a purported left-over of the Knights Templar) who supposedly run the world by manipulating governments, corporations, banks and the Free Masons.

Man, I love a good conspiracy theory. I love it even more when it is espoused by an obviously insane semi-celebrity desperate to remain relevant and in the news. The video below is almost as funny as the ones posted by the folks who believe the world is being run by reptilian aliens. Except none of these folks are really funny. Just sad. So very, very sad. You can skip around the clip without really missing anything - none of it makes any sense at all.

And that's just one of two videos she's posted on the subject. It's a shame, because she's actually adorable and could have a real career as a performer if she got her act together. I just want to bring her home and give a good home-cooked meal, administer some much-needed thorazine and rock her to sleep. Or slap the silly beotch about 30 or 40 times until she comes to her senses. 

Wow - that may well be what I need to snap me out of my recent funk.

Call me, Tila. I can help you. All you need is a dose of real reality.

More, anon.

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Hellboy's Heart and Other Good News

Via Spectral Motion

It was a beautiful day (finally) in the Northeast and I wanted to talk about things that are making me feel at least a little better about the world, so here we go. 

The last celebrity story I remember reading about the Make-a-Wish foundation, involved Food Network's Evil Hamptons Ho, Ina Garten and her denial of a child's request to spend an afternoon cooking with her. F*ck you, Ina! This first part of tonight's post is about one celebrity who really went all out to make a kid's wish come true (Get out your tissues for this one).

Zachary's dream was to meet and be his favorite superhero, Hellboy, played in two pretty great Guillermo Del Toro movies (both of which begin in the most hilariously unlikely and inaccurate version of Trenton, NJ as only Del Toro could imagine) by beloved genre actor, Ron Perlman. To make Zachary's wish come true, Perlman spent hours in makeup to become Hellboy and spend the day with the boy. Then his makeup team turned Zachary into a young Hellboy. How awesome is Ron Perlman, folks? Suck it, Ina. I don't care how many gay friends you pretend to have, you're a terrible person.

You can link to Spectral Motion's Facebook page album at the link in the photo caption. Kudos, Mr. Perlman (as if we needed yet another reason to love you!).

And now on to another site I (and everyone else in the world) visit frequently, YouTube. Do you ever get sucked into the comments people make on some videos? Do you hate them, but still somehow get baited into responding to the trolls? Well then, the brainy zombies over at BoingBoing have the answer you may well be seeking. Herp Derp is a free browser extension that converts all YouTube comments to "herp derp herp herp derp." I trust the folks at BoingBoing - their reputation is without question and the thing works beautifully.  If you HAVE to see a comment, you can click on it. I found it funny and even though I rarely read YouTube comments, I downloaded it for fun. 

And now for something completely gay. Via The Accidental Bear (site may be NSFW), here are porn-star Conner Habib and 'psycho musician' Christeene giving advice to a guy whose boyfriend is ashamed of the commercialization of Pride. It's perfectly weird, funny, gay and actually offers two valid opinions.And it's safe for work at inclusive companies. I'm going to try and embed the clip, but AB seemed to have some issues and so I'm going to add the same link that he did to the original at NewNowNext if you have a problem viewing it here.

Get More: Watch Reality TV, Video and Movies, Logo TV

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Worst Gay Person of the Week

Scott Thorson

Alleged lover of Liberace, Scott Thorson has found a way to get his name in the news again by claiming to have had an affair with yet another deceased celebrity. Hmmm - who  might that be? Why none other than the King of Pop himself, Michael Jackson. 

Really, Scott? At least Lee was still alive when you sued him for palimony. But you wait 3 years after Jackson's death to capitalize on his name and get people talking about you. It isn't enough that Matt Damon is going to play you in Steven Soderbergh's Liberace biopic Behind the Candelabra (and really, Damon's way hotter than you ever were) opposite Michael Douglas (really?) as the bedazzled Queen of Las Vegas?

I can't say I was a sympathizer of Thorson's before. I'm not at all in favor of outing people who prefer to remain closeted. That is the single thing about being gay that actually is a choice and only one person is allowed to make that choice for you. For Liberace's part, the flamboyant showman (even as he lay dying of AIDS) denied that he was gay. Personally, I'd like to think that Lee just wanted to allow his legions of female fans to retain their fantasy image of him, rather than that he lived in fear of losing his career if he was truthful (as was -- and to some extent, still is -- the case with so many of his generation).

As much as I dislike the fact that he outed someone without consent, I believe most of what Thorson says about the time he spent with Liberace. Honestly, how did any half-savvy person not know that Liberace was gay? But as for Michael Jackson? Thorson is hardly McCauley Caulkin, now is he? 

Thorson and his ilk ride the underbelly of celebrity; taking every opportunity, no matter how insane, to keep their names in circulation. He's no better than the woman who recently claimed to be carrying Justin Bieber's baby. In fact, he's worse because Jackson isn't able to respond (though I am sure his parents, siblings and fans will respond quite vociferously). I can't blame the man for trying to make a living but doing so by involving someone who can never respond to his allegations is beyond despicable.

In fact, Thorson has inspired me to create a new label (as seen above): Worst Gay Person of the Week. Shame on you, Scott Thorson! And shame on every person who will ever appear under this label.

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O, Superman!

Smokin'!

In her 1981 single "O Superman," Laurie Anderson asks "Smoking... or non... smoking?" Personally, I prefer Smokin'! 

Celebrities have been in the news recently for more than just being good looking and/or talented.  Last summer, hottie Ryan Gosling (Drive) made headlines when he broke up a fight in Manhattan between a street artist and an accused thief by paying for the painting in question. 

That same month, zaftig beauty Kate Winslet was visiting Sir Richard Branson's mansion on his private Carribean island when a fire broke out. The Titanic star sprang into action and carried Branson's 90 year-old mother to safety.

Not one to be upstaged, earlier this month Gosling saved British journalist Laurie Penny from certain death in New York City by pulling her out of the path of an oncoming taxi. Penny, not used to right-side driving, looked the wrong way while crossing 6th Avenue. Gosling yelled "Hey, watch out!" and grabbed her before she could become yet another greasy smear on a Manhattan street.

Then this week, "Grey's Anatomy" star Patrick ('McDreamy') Dempsey pulled a teenager from his wrecked Mustang, right in front of the actor's home. Dempsey used a crowbar to get the kid out, probably saving his life. 

McDreamy

Now, not that I want to put myself in any real danger, but why can't I get rescued by a hot, handsome movie star? Maybe George Clooney could stop me from buying an unhealthy, cholesterol-laden popcorn at my local cineplex. Perhaps a shirtless Ryan Reynolds could lean in and make sure my seat belt was correctly fastened or a nearly-naked Chris Evans could save me from drowning in a dangerous undertow off the east coast of Florida. Or, best of all, Jason Statham could protect me from a mysterious cabal who wants me dead before I can reveal their plans to take over the world through some nefarious means. 

Needless to say, I'd be willing to show my gratitude to any one of these heroes in any number of ways... That is, of course, if Winslet stays home that day. It's not that I don't like her - she's just not my type, if you know what I mean.

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I Am Not Liam Neeson

Liam Neeson as Qui-Gon Jinn

I don't remember exactly how the conversation got started today, but we were talking about brushes with celebrity and a friend asked me if I'd ever had any weird or funny celebrity encounters. I've had several, but the one I am about to share has stuck with me, if only to remind me how not famous I am.

I do spend a bit of time in New York and have lived in L.A. and have seen, passed and even met more than a few famous folks. Paul Winfield; Danny Aiello; Jimmy Fallon; Katie Couric; James Earl Jones; Chita Rivera and Treat Williams are some of the famous people I've encountered either in New York or L.A. But in the early aughts, I was working for the NYC Ballet at Lincoln Center, playing Louis XIV as part of their "Family Fanfare" educational program. I would take a very early morning train in, do two shows and then spend the afternoon either sleeping on the train home; shopping; wandering around the city or meeting friends for drinks in Chelsea, Soho or the Village.

One day, after the second show, I had time to kill before meeting a friend downtown for a drink, so I decided to pay a visit to the cafe at the Lincoln Center Barnes and Noble. I got a coffee and a pastry, studied lines for another show I was doing and then got up to head out to catch the 1-9 train downtown. The cafe at the Lincoln Center B&N is on the third floor, as are the Children's Books. I was heading for the Down escalator when none other than Liam Neeson came off the Up escalator, apparently desperate for a children's book of some kind. Our paths intersected and we did the right/left/right dance you do when you're trying to avoid a head-on collision with someone in your path. I think I said something completely lame like "Excuse me, Mr. Neeson" and got out of his way as he headed into the stacks in search of "Harold and the Purple Crayon" (I'm assuming).

Almost immediately after this, two young women came off the Up escalator. One of them approached me and said "Can I have your autograph?" I was stunned for a moment, until her companion yanked her arm and said "Not him, dummy! He's nobody!" The second girl then led her companion in the direction of Neeson, who seemed to me to be not in any mood to talk to fans. Of course, my first thought was "Well, neither are you, bitch!" Chagrined, amused and a bit confused, I made my way downstairs, marveling at the fact that I'd 'danced' with Oskar Schindler; Ethan Fromme; Rob Roy; Jean Val Jean and Qui-Gon Jinn, all at the same time.

If you're in New York and want to have celebrity encounter, I recommend spending time in Lincoln Center. ABC Studios are across the way and there are many shops where celebs spend their money.

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A Star is Gone

Stunning

I usually don't go online on the weekend until later in the evening, so you can imagine my shock when just about everyone I know on Facebook was posting about the death of Whitney Houston. Much like the death of Michael Jackson, I said to myself "What? No, that can't be right." I immediately went to CNN.com where the site's headline confirmed what I'd read on Facebook: "Whitney Houston Dead at 48."

There is nothing sadder to me than seeing a star fall. In the 80's and 90's, the beautiful Ms Houston had it all. She was a 'star' in every sense of the word. Her voice was nothing less than amazing and while she would never win an Oscar, she could act, too. Her cover of Dolly Parton's "I Will Always Love You" from the movie The Bodyguard was inescapable in 1992. Her marriage to Bobby Brown that same year would lead to her addiction to drugs and eventual downfall.

She played the Fairy Godmother is Disney's 1997 remake of Rogers and Hammerstein's "Cinderella" and appeared on "Gimme a Break," "Silver Spoons" and "Boston Public." Lately the subject of ridicule on "SNL" and "The Soup," as late as yesterday she was criticized on Joan River's "Fashion Police" for wearing outdated clothing while out with her most recent boyfriend, rapper Ray-J. With seven albums; four films (Sparkle is scheduled for release this coming August) and a record total of 415 career awards, Houston's sad decline seemed about to take a turn for the better, despite an apparently disastrous European tour last year.

Houston was a talent unlike any who came before and will probably remain unlike any who come after. Her performance of the National Anthem at the 1991 Superbowl is undoubtedly the best performance of the infamously difficult-to-sing song, ever. 

Goodbye, Whitney. You will be missed.

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