The Most Egregious Thing You'll See This Week

I was a sophomore in High School when Annie made it's Broadway debut (look it up and do the math). The comic-strip on which the musical was based debuted in 1933 and was still in syndication when the musical first arrived on the Great White Way. It's ubiquitous anthem "Tomorrow" is one the late 20th Century's most recognizable songs and without it, we wouldn't have Sarah Jessica Parker.  The show has had two revivals, one in 1997 and another in 2012. It was made into a not terrible movie in 1982, starring a local gal with whom my mother shared 1 degree of separation, Aileen Quinn (Mom worked with Aileen's mother back in her Playground Monitor days). Carol Burnett and Tim Curry were the villains in director John Huston's fairly faithful version.

News of a new version slated to star Willa Smith arose about three years ago. Last year it was announced that Smith was out, replaced by Beasts of the Southern Wild Oscar-nominee Quvenzhané Wallis.All seemed well and good until we found out that Cameron Diaz (Bad Teacher) and Jaimie Foxx (Ray) were slated to play Miss Hannigan and the updated version of Daddy Warbucks, Benjamin Stacks (get it? -- ugh!). Okay. Fine. Maybe an update is in order. Urban orphans are certainly VERY different today from those of the Great Depression. I have no problem with making older works relevant to modern audiences. I've set both Much Ado About Nothing and Romeo and Juliet in the 20th Century. A timeless story is just that, right?

Wrong.

Look at this trailer for the 2014 Annie and tell me it doesn't make you want to pull your hair out by the roots.

UGH! It's everything I hate about the treacly original show, combined with every unoriginal thought put to paper by modern, corporate filmmakers. Directed by Will Gluck (best known for teen sex comedies like Easy A), this shameless POS is a perfect example of everything wrong with Hollywood and the U.S. film industry today. The trailer makes it clear that this movie will undoubtedly be the miserable flop that it is destined (and deserves) to be.

More, anon.

Prospero

PS - A special thanks to my friend Sally, who first shared that clip.

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2014 - The Year in Sci-Fi Movies

Well, at least the year in Sci-Fi movies which have piqued my interest, anyway. There are plenty of tentpole movies coming up that have me pitching a cinematic tent, starting in no particular order with director Gareth Edwards (Monsters) reboot of Godzilla starring "Breaking Bad" star Bryan Cranston; Aaron Kickass Taylor-Johnson and the not-a-twin Elizabeth Olsen. 

Disaster maven Roland Emmerich failed miserably with his over-inflated 1998 attempt to reboot the Toho Studios franchise which started the Kaiju genre. Edwards' Monsters was quite good, though it was more of a character-study set inside a Sci-Fi story. The newly released trailer looks amazing. I didn't get to see del Toro's Kaiju movie Pacific Rim. I won't be missing Godzilla:

Andy and Lana Wachowski, who gave us The Matrix and 2012's wildly underrated Cloud Atlas, are back this year with Jupiter Ascending, a seemingly Jungian tale of a seemingly ordinary young woman who discovers she is the key to the fate of the entire Universe. Mila Kunis (Ted; "Family Guy") and a pointy-eared Channing Tatum (Magic Mike) star.

Christopher Nolan's (more on him in a moment) cinematographer Wally Pfister makes his directing debut with Transcendence, about a terminally ill A.I. scientist whose consciousness is uploaded to a mainframe and sets about to destroy life as we know it. Johnny Depp (thankfully not in a Burton or Verbinski film) stars alongside Kate Mara and Nolan favs Morgan Freeman and Cillian Murphy.

Marvel has four major films coming out this year, further cementing their dominance in the Superhero genre. Of course, Uncle P has never been a fan of Andrew Garfield as Spider-Man, so I will be skipping that movie. But I have every intention of seeing X-Men: Days of Future Past; Captain America: The Winter Soldier and the weirdest of the "Avengers"-related movies. Guardians of  the Galaxy.

Then there's the sequel to the Planets of the Apes franchise, Dawn of the Planet of the Apes. The creator of Gollum and the most recent incarnation of King Kong, Andy Sirkus reprises his CGMC role as the sentient chimpanzee Caesar. Gary Oldman; Keri Russell; Judi Greer and Kody Smit-McPhee (Let Me In) co-star.

Then there's the "Found Footage" movie, Earth to Echo, about a group of boys who discover an alien in a very Spielbergian film from first-time feature director Dave Green:

Last, though hardly least, is Christopher Nolan's belated semi-annual birthday gift to me, Interstellar. Shrouded, as all of Nolan's movies are in secrecy, Featuring a huge cast of major stars, including Matthew McConhaughy; Anne Hathaway; Jessica Chastain; Michael Caine; John Lithgow; Ellen Burstyn and Matt Damon, Interstellar is about a space crew using a wormhole top traverse the galaxy.

As the Brits might say, I am chuffed for the upcoming movie year!  How about you?

More, anon.
Prospero

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"Penny Dreadful" is NOT a Drag Queen

Photo via EW.com

I guess I lied. Or rather, changed my mind. I'll talk about upcoming Sci-Fi movies soon, though. I promise.

And I while know I have talked a little bit about "Penny Dreadful," a new trailer has recently been released, distracting me once again with it's style and tone and very interesting (if not exactly original) concept, as well as a rather fascinating cast.

A little background...

In 1999, graphic novelist Alan Moore ("Watchmen") created "The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen," in which several Victorian-era literary characters (Mina Harker, Captain Nemo, Alan Quatermain and others) work together for British Intelligence to 'Protect the Empire.' The series was turned into an infamously terrible movie with Sean Connery, Stuart Townsend and Shane West.

Building on that concept, while adding a decidedly dark supernatural element, Showtime's up-coming series "Penny Dreadful" takes that central premise and goes "American Horror Story" on it. Josh Hartnett (wasn't he supposed to be a 'Next Big Thing' once upon a time?); former James Bond Timothy Dalton; Eva Green and Broadway's Spider-Man, Reeve Carney head up the cast of this creepy, spooky, sexy series created by John Logan (screenwriter of Skyfall; Hugo and Gladiator).

My current favorite cable drama, "Shameless," is also on Showtime and will end it's (exceptionally gut-wrenching and hilarious) season soon. I can only imagine how much I'm going to love their steroid-infused version of TLEG via AHS.




I'm very pleased to see genre TV having such a renaissance. 

More, anon.
Prospero

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Werewolves Are NOT the New Zombies

Tyler Hoechlin of MTV's "Teen Wolf"

In the pantheon of Horror archetypes,Werewolf used to rank just below Vampire. Since a little black and white horror movie in 1968, werewolves have been knocked down a peg or two. Obviously, all three are insanely popular in genre TV. MTV's "Teen Wolf" (which I gave up on last season) and SyFy's "Being Human" and their new series "Bitten" prove that. They have been less successful on the big screen, of late. I don't know anyone who actually likes the Underworld movies and don't understand why they keep getting made and Benicio Del Toro's 2010 effort to reinvigorate yet another Universal Monsters franchise (The Wolfman) failed miserably and season one of producer/director Eli Roth's "Hemlock Grove" for Netflicks was a total bore. 

Personally, I can name only two werewolf movies in the last 30 years that were actually up to snuff. The first is director Joe Dante's (Mad Max; Gremlins) almost brilliantly realized 1981 version of Gary Brandner's novel The Howling. Featuring the first real physical werewolf transformation on film (thanks to Rob Bottin) and a very funny script by John Sayles, the movie ultimately fails when Dee Wallace (as a TV reporter) has an on-camera transformation, resulting in something that looks more like an over-sized Pekingese than a vicious killer.

Of course, probably the best werewolf movie ever made is John Landis' An American Werewolf in London. Scary, funny and romantic, Landis' movie set a bar which has yet to be met.

Runners up: Neil Jordan's very dark re-telling of 'Little Red Riding Hood,' The Company of Wolves and Christoph Gans' 2001 Brotherhood of the Wolf. 

Unfortunately, despite the presence of the eye-candy that is Jason Momoa, the upcoming French-made Wolves doesn't look likely to bring the subgenre back.

Personally... Cats are way scarier (and sexier):



More, anon.
Prospero

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TV Review: "Helix"

SyFy (I still can't get used to that silly name) debuted their latest original series "Helix" on Friday night with a double episode premiere. 

Set in an underground bio-lab in the Arctic, "Helix" is ostensibly about a group of CDC doctors led by Dr. Alan Farragut (Billy Campbell), who are sent to investigate a possible viral outbreak at the unregulated facility. Farragut is recruited by his ex-wife ("Supernatural" alum Kyra Zagorsky) primarily because the only surviving victim is his brother Peter (Neil Napier), with whom said ex-wife had an affair which ended their marriage. When Farragut and his team arrive, they are injected with RIFD's in their palms, which supposedly give them full access to the entire facility. 

Peter, near death with wildly fluctuating vitals and black blood when his brother's team arrives, somehow manages to escape his quarantined bed and rip his way into the facility's air ducts, using the severed hand of a security officer to access rooms now denied to him and spread the infection to other scientists. Meanwhile, a member of Alan's team learns that rats aren't the only lab animals in the facility when she is attacked by an infected rhesus monkey, after being told that no monkeys were present. It's obvious that something nefarious is going on here, especially after the facility's top scientist, Dr. Hatake (Hiroyuki Sanada), removes his contact lenses to reveal an unusual pair of reflective eyes.

I've been a huge fan of (and must admit to a massive crush on) the very attractive Campbell since first seeing him in The Rocketeer, a movie that should have done better at the box office and should have launched Campbell into an 'A-List' career. Most recently seen on TV as a disreputable politician in AMC's version of "The Killing," Campbell also starred as the leader of the cultish group of alien abduction survivors on USA's "The 4400," a show I loved and miss. He's still massively hot here and I would me remiss if I didn't admit that I'd watch him in almost anything in which he appears. That having been said, he once again holds his own among a cast of mostly unknowns in a series that offers few real surprises (so far).

Despite some dicey CGI effects and a storyline appropriated from several other sources (Stephen King's "The Stand" and John Carpenter's The Thing among them), I found myself thoroughly involved in and intrigued by "Helix" and am looking forward to seeing where it will go. And the upcoming appearance by "Star Trek" and "Body of Proof" alum Jeri Ryan will certainly appeal to both the str8 boys watching, as well as her many gay fans. Darker and decidedly creepier than my other SyFy favorite "Warehouse 13" (which is about to enter it's fifth and sadly final season), "Helix" has lots of potential. I just hope it lives up to that potential.

*** (Three Out of Four Stars).

More, anon.
Prospero

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2013 in Film

Saw several. Missed more (and a few have yet to open). Here (via) are 2013's movies in review:

I have lots to catch up on...

More, anon,
Prospero

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November Turkey of the Month

I couldn't let Turkey Month end without a true turkey, could I? Will Smith continues to ride the wave downwards with this 2008 stinker about the most unlikeable superhero, ever. Hancock may pose some interesting questions, but never bothers to answer them and it's hero ends up looking more like a dick, than anything else.

With no memories of his origins and lawsuits against him for the destruction he's caused, Smith's John Hancock is a cypher (if only). After his latest debacle, he his contacted by PR genius Ray Embrey (Jason Bateman),whose wife (Charlize Theron) just happens to be Hancock's immortal partner (or some such nonsense), doomed to immortal super powers (oh, boo-hoo!)

On a side note, no matter how adorable many of us may find Jason Bateman, there is little room in my imagination to allow Ms Theron to be his wife. 

"Breaking Bad" creator Vince Gilligan may have come up with the concept for Hancock, but not every idea is a good one. Poorly written and loaded with bad CGI FX, Hancock serves as just another notch on Smith's increasingly large list of bad movies. I was 'lucky' enough to see this movie for free while on a business trip a few years ago. I almost felt guilty about billing it to my expense account. There are rumors of a Hancock 2. It is my fervent hope that they will remain just that.

Given Smith's most recent track record, which includes Wild, Wild West; I Am Legend; Hancock and M.Night Shamalamadingdong's After Earth, I'd say Will needs a new manager. And while I won't go into the rumors about Will and Jada and their supposed sexualities, I will say that Mr.Smith might want to consider going back into the music industry. At the very least, he should teach his son to keep his mouth shut when it comes to education. 

In the end, Hancock is a truly terrible movie and certainly deserves the title "Turkey."

Ugh!

More, anon.
Prospero

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Retro Review: "The Bay"

Netflix is a wonder, y'all. Why didn't you tell me about it before? Now I know it's not your fault. I'm not the best at electronics and thankfully sis set up my Wii for me (after having for three years) and now I have the service that put Blockbuster out of business. And because I do, I have seen quite a few movies I'd been reading about but missed their first times around (House of the Devil; VHS - a few others). Tonight, Michael and I watched director Barry Levinson's (Diner; Rainman; Toys) take on the Found Footage Horror genre, The Bay.

Set up like a documentary expose, The Bay tells the tale of a small Maryland town which is hit with an outbreak of a devastating parasites on July Fourth, 2009. Anchored by the account of TV news intern (Kether Donahue) and footage supposedly pieced together from surveillance cameras; cell phone cameras; video recorders; police dash-cams and Skype sessions, Levinson's film is both an indictment of corporate malfeasance and ecological indifference, with plenty of gross-outs along the way. Amidst the the Independence Day celebrations, the people of a small Maryland town along the Chesapeake bay are suddenly struck down by rashes, boils and other horrific symptoms which soon overwhelm the local hospital's ER and have the CDC at a loss. 

Unlike most 'Found Footage' films, Levinson doesn't rely on only one or two cameras to tell his story (Michael Wallach's screenplay is based on Levinson's original story), but uses a variety of digital cameras to capture the horrific events, lending an air of veracity often missing from many such movies. The performances from the mostly unknown cast (particularly Stephen Kinken as the confounded but dedicated ER doctor) are effective while the special effects are often quite cringe-worthy (in a good way). Levinson is a truly hit-or-miss director (I'm one of the few who actually likes the underrated Robin Williams fantasy Toys) but I think I have to count The Bay among his hits. Smart, effective and perfectly plausible, The Bay is almost reminiscent of The Ruins in its simple concept and execution. **1/2 (Two and a Half Stars Out of Four)

More, anon.
Prospero

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