Hot, Gay, Shakesperean, Sci-Fi Food Nonsense

Chip Off the Old Block

How's that for a post title? To be perfectly honest, all of those do apply to this post overall, just not necessarily all at the same time. 

It's been a fairly stressful weekend culminating with my mother having what her Dr. described to me as a "small heart-attack." She will be fine and is scheduled for a cath procedure on Tuesday. I am also in the midst of rehearsals for a reading of a play with some dark and very close-to-home subject matter and have really been trying to avoid anything which didn't make me smile and/or laugh when I'm not forced to go dark places. 

And while I do so love the Fall season and Halloween (which is a fun kind of darkness), it also means dread Winter is close at hand. Like plants, I don't exactly thrive in the Winter, though extra Vitamin D supplements and the rich, fattening foods of the Winter holidays help.

Attitude plays a large part of it, too. It's my choice to wallow in the dark or shine my own light through it. I realize that's kind of cheesy and self-helpy or whatever, but it is 100% true. To do that, one should concentrate on the things in life that make it worth living: Beauty, Family, Friendship, Art, Laughter, Joy... These all counterbalance the truly dark stuff. And speaking of Beauty, that's Clint Eastwood's 27 year old son Scott (via) in a photo shoot for 'Town and Country,' Undeniably his father's son, Eastwood the younger has appeared in several unremarkable films, but is suddenly all over the web (especially on the LGBT blogs). I swear, the boy gives me the vapors!

So that's the Hot. On to the Gay. "Queer Lisboa," Portugal's only LGBTQ International Film Festival, has a history of amusing and provocative advertising. This year's is no different, though I imagine it has a certain anti-Semitic, homophobic has-been crying bitter tears of righteous rage:

J'adore, j'adore, j'adore... Yes, that's the Gay. What about the Shakespearean Sci-Fi? Well, hang onto your gay geek hats. The Husky Jackal Theatre Company presents: "William Shakespeare's Terminator the Second," a fully staged production of T2:Judgement Day using only dialog actually written by The Bard. The trailer embedded below is just an amazing bit of hilarious genius:

William Shakespeare Presents: Terminator the Second - Official Trailer from Husky Jackal on Vimeo.

Which leaves us with Food, but which also ties back to Hot (you know what that is). Here's an adorable shirtless guy (via) teaching you how to correctly pronounce the names of European and Asian foods which many Americans mispronounce. Don't know if it's his mischievous grin, deliberately messy hair, his infectious enthusiasm or the fact that it's actually educational that makes me love it so much. 

Oh, I remember now. It's his Treasure Trail. Wow! I just went there, didn't I?

I'm wishing all of you the better week I'm wishing for myself. Of course, one of my maternal grandmother's ('Grandmom Cookie') many colorful sayings was "Wish in one hand and sh*t in the other one and see which one fills up first." Never let the dark keep you from appreciating the light, the joy and the nonsense that is our time here. Instead, embrace the dark with the light, joy and nonsense. We need the dark to appreciate the light, joy and nonsense. Learning that is never easy.

More, anon.
Prospero

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Guerilla Filmmaking and Other Movie Nonsense

Escape from Tomorrow

From the Happy Mutants over at BoingBoing comes this review of a film which premiered at Sundance this weekend. Escape from Tomorrow tells the story of a man who, on the last day of his family vacation in Orlando, learns he has lost his job. As the film  progresses, the man slowly loses his grip on reality, eventually creating a surreal and nightmarish descent into madness. Of course, the extraordinary thing is that the film was apparently shot without the knowledge or cooperation of the Disney corporation, which has been known to sue daycare centers for copyright infringements and asking Santa to leave their parks. Film critic Drew McWeeny says "It is impossible this film exists... And yet, not only does it exist; but it's fascinating." 

Long-time readers know that Uncle P's sister is a self-described "Disney Dork." In fact, last weekend she and the BIL went on their second Disney cruise. And while I personally prefer Universal Studios, I must admit that I have been to Disneyworld at least five times. Which makes Escape from Tomorrow all that much more fascinating to me. 

Personal friends know that I adore off-the-wall, experimental and outright bizarre film experiences. Movies like Richard Elfman's Forbidden Zone; David Lynch's Eraserhead; Quentin Dupieux's Rubber; Terry Gilliam's Brazil; David Cronenberg's Naked Lunch and Guy Maddin's The Saddest Music in the the World are very much why I love film so much. They make me feel like I'm not alone in my personally skewed vision of life.

Here's a clip from Escape from Tomorrow, featuring daddy-bear star Roy Abramsohn dealing with his obsession with two French teenagers at a Disney resort pool:

I don't know how director Randy Moore pulled off this film, though I am amazed and excited that he did. McWeeny supposes the movie will never find a distributor and will eventually fall into obscurity, thanks to Disney's phalanx of lawyers. Still, I think that I must see Escape from Tomorrow, if only to satisfy my curiosity and add it to my list of outsider films I've loved or hated.

Trust me, I don't get it anymore than you.

More, anon.

Prospero

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Retro Reviews: "Chronicle" & "A Very Harold and Kumar 3D Christmas"

Okay, so I lied. I was planning on taking  a day off from blogging, but then I saw two movies today that I'd been saving on my DVR and wanted to talk about them, so there went that. And I'm also thinking that it would be nice this year to have at least a full month's worth of posts. which would satisfy that small part of my left brain that insists on order in at least some measure.

I had hoped to see both of these movies when there were current, but instead caught up with them on Showtime and Cinemax. First up: A Very Harold and Kumar 3D Christmas.

I have to admit that I really love Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle. The whole movie is just completely ridiculous and absurdly hilarious in the vein of Better Off Dead and Cheech and Chong's Up In Smoke. Outrageous, preposterous and downright silly, Kal Penn ("House") and John Cho (Star Trek) are perfect as two pot-smoking buddies on a quest for greasy fast food. Along they way they ride a cheetah through the woods and encounter a very wasted Neal Patrick Harris. The duo returned in 2008 with Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay, an equally outrageous but not quite as funny sequel (trailers may be NSFW):

Last year saw what is hopefully the last of the series. Set six years after Guantanamo Bay, the latest movie in the franchise has Harold married to a hot Latina, while working as a broker and trying desperately to win the approval of his father-in-law (Danny Trejo). Kumar, meanwhile, is still a stoner living like a slob months after his girlfriend left him. When a package arrives for Harold at Kumar's apartment, he decides to deliver it in person. The giant joint inside ends up burning down the Father-in-Law's prized Christmas tree and the quest for a replacement begins. What follows is a fairly depressing story involving an accidentally drugged baby; the Russian Mafia; Neal Patrick Harris denying his sexuality (albeit satirically); dosed eggnog; penis 'jokes' and shooting Santa in the head. That's not to say the movie doesn't have its moments. I did laugh more than once (some of the more obvious nods to the 3D were very amusing), but I was more often mystified as to why Penn and Cho would stoop to some of the truly appalling things that happen in this movie. 1/2* (Half a Star Out of Four) Trailer very NSFW:

But my disappointment in that movie was more than made up for by Josh Trask and Max Landis' exploration of the Superhero genre using the mostly first person "found footage" technique for Chronicle, a surprisingly effective film about three teenagers who suddenly find themselves with increasingly potent superpowers told mostly through the lens of shy young Andrew (Dane DeHaan) whose mother is dying and whose alcoholic father (Michael Kelly) copes by abusing his son. Andrew's closest friend is his cousin, Matt (hottie on-the-rise Alex Russell), who just wants Drew to put down the camera and enjoy being a teenager. Matt convinces Andrew to accompany him to a rave, where Matt and his buddy Steve (Michael B. Jordan) find a weird hole in the woods. When the three climb down into the hole, they discover a cave housing... something. While it is never explained what the object they encounter is, it appears both alien and sentient. After their encounter, they discover they have been changed. 

A cleverly written take on the Superhero genre, Landis (son of famed director John) and Trask wisely introduce all the trappings of teenaged angst in their screenplay, without having to announce that they're doing so. The performances in Chronicle are as honest as any I've seen, with all three of the film's stars tapping into both the coming-of-age and comic book zeitgeists without a hint of irony or cheesiness. Russell, who will next be seen as Billy Nolan in the Carrie remake, is both likeable and believable as the trio's voice of reason, while DeHaan does his bast young Edward Furlong as the confused and angry Andrew. Jordan ("The Wire;" "Friday Night Lights;" "Parenthood") may be the most recognizable member of the cast and while he gets the least screentime of the three, Steve was the most relate-able and likeable character. The SFX in Chronicle are quite remarkable for an indie film, particularly during the rather breathtaking flying sequences. The eventual tragedy that comes from their circumstances, though obviously foreseeable, is no less tragic for being so and is made so much more poignant by Russell and DeHaan's performances. If you haven't seen Chronicle, you've missed one of this year's true gems. **** (Four Out of Four Stars). This is one that is definitely going on my 2012 Top 10 List!

More, anon.
Prospero

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The Gayest, Weirdest and Most Krampus-related Things You'll See This Week.

Five Dances (photo via)

I wanted to talk about several things today and couldn't decide which to focus on and decided to write about all of them. So here goes:

First up: This week's Gayest Thing is the new film from writer/director Alan Brown (Private Romeo, a flawed but admired Shakespearean adaptation set at a military school), a coming of age romance about a dancer (hottie Ryan Steele) finding and being himself in New York, Five Dances. I liked the idea behind his last film, but what little I saw didn't stick with me and I forgot all about until the trailer for Five Dances. Brown displayed some interesting ideas in the trailer for Private Romeo, if not all the skills to successfully bring them to fruition. But from the trailer below (via), it seems that Brown has learned a thing or two since then. Five Dances may turn out to the gay version of of every modern DanceMance* since 1982 or it could be the sappiest romantic drama since the insipid Love Story (a horribly manipulative movie!). Or it just might be a good movie. I'm hoping for the latter:

FIVE DANCES trailer from Alan Brown on Vimeo.

*I am hereby coining the term "DanceMance," used to refer to the sub-genre of romance films centered around dance. See: Footloose; Flash Dance; Step Up, etc., ad nauseum. Only you can spread it into the lexicon by using and sharing it.  Anyway, it looks pretty and there's plenty of eye candy for almost everyone's tastes.

"Your suffering will be legendary..."

Well... on to this week's Weirdest Thing, which is related to the above story by the most tenuous of links -- Dance. I would NOT call what I am about to share a DanceMance, by any stretch of the imagination. What it is, is a bizarre Horror movie mashup video known as "PINHEAD JASON Buffalo Bill DANCE?" The YouTube description says: "WARNING: Just another IDIOT ! doing a Silence of the Lambs Buffalo Bill DANCE ! because YouTube just doesn't have enough of those ? Song by Q LAZARUS" You don't need to watch very much to see everything he does over and over for the entire video, but the fact that someone thought to combine these three iconic Horror villains, is not just weird -- it is downright disturbing (may be NSFW, though no full nudity):

Dashing Through the Reich

Finally, I was going to review the mid-season finale of "The Walking Dead" tonight, but had too many distractions. But I also had a bit of holiday inspiration. I change my Facebook profile picture a lot. If you've seen Uncle P's profile pics here over the years, you know I like to keep them interesting and amusing. My previous profile picture was of Santa Cthulhu. Today I was reminded of Krampus (driving St. Nick's chopper there) and changed my pic to a rather festive rendering of the nasty, Germanic and Eastern European 'Anti-Clause,' who punishes bad children with beatings, dunkings and lumps of coal. Of course the message is "Don't be good to just get rewards, kids! Be good to avoid beatings from a demon!" Happy Holidays!!!! Merry Christmas!!!! I hope you aren't beaten and ass-raped by a Christmas monster from hell. Anyway... Good ole Krampus gave me an idea that has me a little psyched. No details yet, but I'll let you know what, when and if, anything comes of it.

More anon,
Prospero.

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The Gayest Things You'll See This Week

Kellan Lutz

So, let's get away from politics, violence, religion and Chick-Fil-A, shall we?

My friend Megan and I have this running joke about Kellan Lutz. We both agree that the "90210" and Twilight actor is gorgeous, but probably vapid and practically brainless. Of course, not knowing him personally, we have no idea if this is true or not - so please - no hate mail about him (or us). Still, if you Google images of him, you'll find that in the majority of the photos of him that are available online, whether clothed or semi-naked,  he has the same goofy smile on his face as he does in the photo on your left. He always makes me think of the Julie Brown song "I Like 'Em Big and Stupid." And while Big and Stupid may be fun for a one-nighter, it doesn't bode well for a relationship. After all that hot and sweaty rolling around in the hay, what do you talk about? Philosophy? Astrophysics? Grammar? Probably not. Sigh.

Anyway, The Hollywood Reporter has announced that Lutz has been signed to play a straight man in gay world in director David Tillman's indy feature All You Need is Love. The film supposes a world in which gay people are in the majority. Lutz plays a man who falls in love with a woman (Camilla Belle) and is bullied for doing so. Based on a short film by Kim Rocco Shields, with a screenplay by Shields and Tillman, All You Need is Love may just be what doubting straight folks need to change their attitudes about LGBT folks. Of course, that was the hope many of us held out for Ang Lee's Brokeback Mountain - which did a lot for our cause, but wasn't exactly the turning point we'd hoped it would be. The point, of course, is to show str8 people what we have to deal with on a regular basis. Whether or not the message will be heard and received, remains to be seen. 

Also (via) in gay entertainment news is the Disney/Top 40 mashup "Cinderfella" (not to be confused with the 1960 Jerry Lewis movie of the same name) from former "American Idol" contestant Todrick Hall. One line reminds me of my days directing Shakespeare at Princeton, where many of the students were fond of asking "Do you go here?" How many Princes and Princesses can you spot? Look for appearances from Janice Dickerson; William Belli; Kimberly Cole; Aubrey O'Day; Lance Bass and Ben Melick. Legalize Love, indeed.

More, anon.
Prospero

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